Under Construction
i will update soon!
posted by Cindy Niel @ 5:05 PM
time out
a place with no kids
About Me
- Name: Cindy Niel
- Location: Indianapolis, Indiana
i am a pretty simple, easy going person. i love having people around. i love my family, and i love to cook, oh and of course, 24.
Previous Posts
3 Comments:
help!!! i can't remember how to get into my own blog!!!
isaiah set this up for me but i can't remember how to get in. he showed me like to week ago.
well anyway, this is cindy and this is what my first entry would be...
i have gained a new perspective on LIFE. more on this later...
he had grandma, my mom, my cousin, and my aunt there by his side when he took his last breath. isaiahand i had left about an hour and a half before he passed. i truly think either grandpa or God made sure i was not there. i was so torn as to if i wanted to actually be in the room. it seems as if that decision was made for me and i didnt have to worry any more about having to decide. there were so many times we thought he was taking his last breaths but his breathing was just decreasing. he would take a breath and not take another for 30 seconds to a minute. that was absolutely terrible. i am torn to say that i am thankful it is all over. of course i would rather have my grandpa here, but the suffering is over. my spirits are amazingly higher than i would think. but moments come and go. i have yet to really sit down with myself and allow myself to really feel anything. i know when i do that, a whole ocean of emotions will flood me.
back to the life thing...i am so proud of my mom and my family. this has really brought us together. my uncle is clean (cross your fingers and say a prayer) and he got clean before grandpa got sick, so he was able to see my uncle get better. that means so much to all of us. my mom is going to try to stop saying "oh my god" and "jesus christ" in vain. she really feels a connection to God and has all though this with grandpa. i think we all have. it is so hard to explain, but it is the first time in my life we as a family have put our hearts on our sleeves and allowed God to come in and speak to us as a family - and then we talked about it! it was an amazing thing.
well, i guess i did it!! as luke would say, "i deeed it, i deeeeed it!! yey!!
well, now i checked my blog, and i guess i "deeeedn't do it" :(
i left a comment on my own blog...i will catch on.
Post a Comment
<< Home